You’ve said, “I do,” you’ve returned from your honeymoon and the first month of married life is now under your belt. Unfortunately, while the stress of wedding planning and to-dos is complete, the reality of your new marriage and new way of living has set in. The first year of marriage is full of an array of changes which, frankly, can be overwhelming. Whether you have been living together for years or have become roommates for the first time, adding a “Mr.” or “Mrs.” in front of your name may bring more challenges to your relationship than you had anticipated. And while no two marriages are ever the same, there are a few things you can keep in mind to keep that newlywed bliss at an all-time high.
Don’t Forget About the Romance
As cliché as this first may be, there is something to be said if everyone is saying it! Simple things such as keeping your phone off the dinner table, designating one night out of the week for a date night or making sure to kiss each other goodnight can have a lasting impact on your marriage in the smallest ways possible. Make your relationship and the romance a priority – after all, love is what brought you together.
Go Easy on Yourselves
Chasing perfection is an easy trap to find yourself in, but keep in mind that it is normal to have not-so-perfect days. Disagreements, small tiffs or miscommunications can change the dynamic of your relationship in a split second, but be sure to not dwell on these. Instead, talk about your imperfections and the challenging times. Conversations surrounding your frustrations can be the most therapeutic and efficient way to put your differences at bay. Know that marriage is a marathon and not a sprint. Talk with other married women, whether it is a friend or an older relative, because it can be helpful to seek advice on how to navigate the ebbs and flows.
Don’t Be Afraid to Lean on Your Partner
We are often taught to be fearless and independent, but the beauty of marriage is knowing that you do not have to go through life alone. Whether it is leaning on your partner financially or emotionally, it is okay to rely on your partner’s support when the burden of life can become too heavy. Discuss ways you can lean on each other when life’s stressors are at an all-time high. Working together to find solutions is the easiest way to keep yourself and your marriage at peace.
Say “Thank You”
Comparing ourselves to others or setting unrealistic expectations can lead to feeling unsatisfied in your relationship. Instead of focusing on the negative, highlight the positive aspects of your relationship and the encouraging things your partner brings to the table. By practicing gratitude and being thankful, you can bring a new aspect to your relationship’s dynamic. Even a small text message saying “thank you” can go an incredibly long way.
Take Care of Yourself
As you begin to embark on your marriage, it can become easy to lose yourself. Nurturing your husband and providing as a wife is all unfamiliar territory. Do not lose focus of yourself. Finding a hobby, a group of friends to relax with or simply taking 30 minutes out of your day to reset yourself can be key in not losing yourself while fostering for someone else. When you are at your best, your marriage will be, too. Take the time to reset; your marriage will be better for it!
Realize It Won’t Always Be 50/50
Balance is everything. Days, weeks or even months can be unequal when it comes to the cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping or laundry. There is no time card to punch in or punch out when it comes to time spent doing the household chores. What is most important; however, is feeling supported when the times are not split evenly. Duties and responsibilities around the house will often rotate between you and your partner, and that is okay.
Keep Having Adventures
After all the excitement of the wedding, it’s natural to feel a dip in your mood, but the best way to continue that newlywed feeling is to have adventures with your spouse. Try a new restaurant, go on a road trip or take up a joint hobby. Keep learning, growing and trying new things together.